Resistance to Change

There is supposed to be Resistance to the process.

I didn’t set out to teach happiness directly, and if you follow what I teach you will probably notice that I don’t. I don’t focus on the positive very much. I spend more time focusing attention on false beliefs and egocentric thinking that interferes with being happy. More than half the battle is identifying false fear based beliefs and eliminating them.

My sense is that being happy is easy… sort of. At least it was easy when we were children. Our joy naturally flowed out of us. But over years we had experiences that were painful. Maybe we got punished for talking too much and so we learned not to express ourselves. We learned to hold back what we felt we wanted to say. Instead we walked around with a fear of saying too much. Maybe we had a breakup and a broken heart. From that we learned to be afraid of love. Perhaps we got a bad grade and we became afraid of failing. We then spent so much effort trying to control outcomes of success that we forgot to enjoy our life. Maybe one day we were at school and we became the butt of a joke. That sense of hurt might still be inside festering. At other times we might have been hurt or afraid and mom or dad wasn’t there in the way we needed to reassure us. We ended up spiraling into more fear and pain instead with beliefs that the world was unsafe and we were alone to survive on our own.

Whatever our personal history of beliefs, we certainly acquired some that were fear based and false. We became more focused on being a success, or avoiding failure, than on being happy. The result is that these beliefs rule our mind, emotions, and behavior. Very often we do not even know they are there. As we get older we become wiser and our priorities change. We realize that two of the most important things we can do in our life is to love and be happy. This is when the conflict begins. The previous decades of belief system programming into our unconscious patters is in direct conflict with our desire for happiness. This kind of resistance is normal.

At this point we discover that the simple things we want to do to be happy, like love our self, have such incredible resistance to doing. It is the elimination of this resistance that is fundamental to change and what I focus on in the Self Mastery program and various audios. When you deal with your own Ego, AKA voices in our head, false self images, false beliefs and false identity, being happy can be pretty easy and simple. But dealing with your own fears and Ego can be some hard work for a while before that happens. Of course, most things worth doing usually require some work for a while. Then after the work is over being happy is pretty easy because there aren’t any unconscious beliefs and ego resisting the love anymore.

As you endeavor to be happy, know that it is normal that there is resistance. That understanding will help you through the process an accepting, compassionate, and skillful way if you are to be happy long term.

Hope that helps.

Gary